I'm Really Sorry Big Hair

photo of a sad girl
Lately I've be overly upset with the Big Hair, and I've come to realize that its all been for no reason at all. I wrote a very long post about how he kept upsetting me, and looking back at that list, I can see, that everything I was mad about was just stupid, and typical girl complaints. Am I expecting him to be able to read my mind and do everything I want, without doing too much, because you know a girl doesn't like that either. 

I mean really.  I see him literally every weekend for a full day making him get up early and pretty late. Even when we set a time, I'm super eager for him to come, and try and press him to get to my house even earlier. Then when its time to leave I try and get him to stay just a little longer. Isn't he doing enough by driving an hour from his school to come see me? Do I think I'm that special.

Last night, I accused him of lying to me. He had told me on Saturday that he wanted to leave me early so that he could spend some time at home since this was the only day this weekend he would get to be away from school. Well, when we were texting he mentioned that his sister had cried from a movie earlier that day, and I assumed he had went home, even when he told me he hadn't. I looked at his sisters twitter and saw that she posted a picture that was quite incriminating of him being there, so I of course was angry. Mind you this wasn't him hanging out with a girl, just sitting at home looking like he just woke up from a nap. 

I'm pretty open with expressing my displeasure so I immediately let him know and then he called me. This was one of the things on my list for what I want in a boyfriend. He was pretty consistent in saying he didn't go home, and it really does make sense. Why would he drive to school have hours of rehearsal and then drive back home to watch a movie? He wasn't even mad that I was accusing him of lying, just sad because I was upset. He stayed on the phone with me for like an hour while I tried not to cry because I honestly felt terrible about the whole thing. He was actually very understanding, and seemed to think it was okay that I had accused him.

Which isn't okay at all. When he said that I was just looking to catch him in another lie, jumping to the  first thing I could think of. Its not just that either. Lately I've been just looking for anything that he's doing wrong to call him a bad boyfriend, when he's actually a great boyfriend. Big Hair is fantastic.

He never gets angry with me (not once in the whole year we've be dating), no matter how many stupid or annoying things I do. Whenever I act like I'm five years old, he just goes with it, and lets me be me, no matter where we are. When I'm very hyper, and want to play around he never does, but he lets me use him as a life size punching page without complaint. He always (almost always) buys the food when we go out to eat, which is about every weekend, without ever asking me to split it with him. And best of all he's super affectionate and forgiving of me.

Recently I've been forgetting these things though, and have instead only seen his negatives, and exaggerating them to myself. Although I know I shouldn't put the blame on anything but myself, I think it has to do with that whole Haken Bass Audition that he's been working at. I'm so jealous of the fact that he's more interested in being a part of this band then being here with me that I'm talking it out on him. I guess in my world, my feelings are the only ones that count.

Anyway what I'm trying to say, is sorry Big Hair. You're the bestest boyfriend ever, and lately I haven't been the greatest girlfriend even if I've been pretending its the other way around. 
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...